We Don’t Need No Education

Your jaw will literally drop when you see the shocking state of the fryups being offered to undergraduates in the UK. This shockumentary blows the lid off the greasy underworld of student catering and reveals the dreadful truth behind the cheap seedy fryups which are perverting the palettes of students across the nation.

Sorry, I was advised that my intros could be a bit punchier. Nailed it I think.

The mighty Fry Up Police have again allowed me access to their glorious and terrifying archives to have a peek at what’s going on in the world of higher-education fryups. I’ts generally not a pretty sight.

AA from Newcastle University paid £4.45 for this Prisoner Cell Block H-esque bleak fryup.

u2£4.45, Newcastle Uni cafeAA

JCC blew a chunk of his student loan on this at University of Portsmouth student’s union. ‘Mega-breakfast’. £4.29. Looks very Wetherspoony.

u1University of Portsmouth students union mega breakfast. £4.29JCC

University of Birmingham “Longboat”.  £4.95. A bit more colour on the sausages and a couple of slices of decent bread and I’d give it a sail! Cheers AA.

u3University of Birmingham, 10 piece 'longboat' breakfast £4.95 AA

GP is doing a Masters in Advanced Photography at University of Southampton. Students Union cafe – £4.00 for the 10 item ‘mega’ fry. Sausages, tomatoes and eggs look passable.

u4University of Southampton Students Union cafe - £4.00 for the 10 item 'mega' fry.GP.jpg

This is a bit grim. University of Sheffield , £3.50. Hoping you’re ok AW.

u5University of Sheffield fry-up for £3.50 AW

£2.70, the Great Hall, Christ Church, Oxford. Nice chairs, rubbish sausage SB.

u6£2.70 - the Great Hall, Christ Church, OxfordSB

Every Christmas the University of South Wales cooks an all you can eat breakfast for £3.50. BP is in his 17th year there.

u7Every Christmas the University of South Wales does an all you can eat breakfast for £3.50 BP

RW doesn’t even get a fork at St Mary’s University, Twickenham. £2.50

u8St Mary's University, Twickenham. £2.50RW

£3.50, Elements Cafe at Heriot-Watt University. Is it too late to change your Uni CD?

u9£3.50, Elements Cafe at Heriot-Watt Uni.CD.jpg

TL got this moist one for £4.50 at the Nottingham Trent Uni student’s union.

u10£4.50 at the Nottingham Trent SU TL

SB wept as they poured beans all over that lovely egg. £2.65 Hertfordshire University , not too shoddy for the price.

u12 £2.65 from Hertfordshire Uni canteen SB

Thankfully not all students choose or are forced to rely on their fryups from school-stylee canteens, some of them get off their backsides and do it themselves, producing sublime efforts like this one from PC who is reading Fish at Plymouth.

U13 couthard

I shall be writing to Ofsted or someone about this whole rubbish student fryup issue. Jaws will drop.




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